Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Why does Dunkin Doughnuts hate the Lactose Intolerant?



I love coffee as much as the next American does. I have multiple cups a day, and I often pay for each cup and contribute to polluting the world because I don't use a thermos even though that would probably be a nice effort on my part. 
Daily routine of coffee consumption: A cup on the way to class, a cup between classes while on lunch break, a cup after classes  and then usually a cup after dinner. If it is a night where I'm writing blasphemous amounts of papers I'll usually consume 3-4 more cups of coffee during the time it takes me to get through the work.

So now, what's the problem with this? Besides the fact that I have a serious caffeine addiction that should probably be addressed with some sort of dietary rehab, I don't understand why if I want to enjoy delicious Silk Soy milk in my coffee I have to go to Starbucks and spend upwards of $5 on my coffee. 7-11, no soy milk. Dunkin Doughnuts- no soy milk, they don't even have half and half, they just use cream and let you call it half and half while they laugh at you because your ass is growing.

So if, "America runs on Dunkin'" then America must not be lactose intolerant.

Milk makes me sick. Therefore Dunkin Doughnuts makes me sick. I think they owe the population who is afflicted by different levels of lactose intolerance a freeby. I have a serious issue with paying $5 for my coffee at Starbucks, I have a serious issue with paying $2 for my coffee at Dunkin and then feeling like I need to flush my colon with detox afterwards because my insides feel like they're on fire for days.  I demand a free year of Dunkin Doughnuts coffee and then I'll just carry a cooler around with soymilk in it in my trunk, then America can truly run on Dunkin'.  Until then, Starbucks should stop charging me and extra 40 cents just because I'm lactose intolerant.

I hate this type of discrimination. Do you think Obama will do something about this for me? America needs a change. This American, can't run on Dunkin'.




1 comment:

Unknown said...

Hahaha nice rant! I'm severely allergic to lactose, and was wondering if D&D carried soy milk because I got a coupon for free iced coffees every Monday. I guess this answered my question... xD And I don't think the President would ever get involved in it, so try complaining to the company. Send letters, emails, etc. Threaten to get others to boycott, and you may be seeing some changes as well as freebies from them!